I have been a father for just over 9 years now. Having kids really does change everything! Your daily schedule, your priorities and responsibilities are all shifted once you bring a child into the world. This is not necessarily a bad thing mind you. Actually, the arrival of a child can force you to bring about changes in your life that were once put on the back-burner.
My Path
If you have already read my story, most of this is a recap, but for those that haven’t…
I was your average star athlete at a small high school, with typical aspirations to play a sport in college. That aspiration never panned out, though I don’t regret that at all. I still loved playing competitive sports and continued to do so in my 4 years at Purdue University. I even floundered around in the weight room at the rec center on campus, but nothing too serious or structured. After graduation in 2000, I settled into a job and slowly lost interest in staying active…LIFE HAPPENED. I got married to the love of my life and we had our first child in 2004.
A Decision
It wasn’t until early 2009, nearly 5 years after my first child was born, that I made the decision to change something in my life that I had placed on my personal back-burner. In April 2009, I committed to the P90X fitness program.
At this point in my life, we actually already had 2 children and so the amount of time that I had to commit to something was pretty tight. I was working long hours and would come home and simply want to spend time with my family and be lazy…
However, something lit a fire inside of me and I just knew I wanted to do this and I would succeed at it! 90 days later, I hadn’t skipped a workout and had results that I was pretty proud of!
Fast forward a few years and health and fitness is at the forefront of my mind nearly everyday. I am now a Team Beachbody Coach, which allows me to share my experiences with others and help them achieve their own health and fitness goals. Awesome gig right?
It’s Important – Make it a Priority!
As a father of now 4 kids (9 year old girl, 7 year old boy and 20 month old twin girls), I don’t have to look any further than across the dining room table to see why I feel it is important to maintain my own health and fitness. I wasn’t going to be caught sitting on the sidelines watching, while my kids begged for me to play. Now, granted, I wasn’t so out of shape that I was incapable of keeping up with them at the time I made this change in my life. However, I felt that if I didn’t make it a priority of mine, it could have been something that slowly, over time, swings in the other direction.
If you too are a Dad that has the desire to play along side your kids, take them on adventures or explore new destinations, make it a priority of your own to do whatever it takes to make that happen! Committing to a health and fitness change can sometimes be tough to get started, but it is up to you and you alone to make that decision and persist with your plans!
Excuses – You are lying to yourself
You’ve probably already got 10-12 excuses that you have told yourself in the past.
Are they legitimate?
Not only are you cheating yourself out of what you want, but you are also cheating your kids. Despite the sometimes argumentative day to day interactions with your kids, I can almost guarantee that you are someone that they look up to and they follow the examples that you set. If you set the example and have low standards for yourself, guess who is sure to follow in your footsteps?
You are a superhero to your kids!
Excuses are a common hurdle to encounter, but the CAN be overcome. I found that I wasn’t alone with my excuses either. Here are some excuses from dads that I have gotten to know over the past 2 years and all of them have gotten over their own excuse hurdle with great success!
Neil W.I don't need to exercise I am not in that bad of shape. I don't have time to exercise with kids activities and responsibilities. I can't do the exercises bc my knee cant take it. All those supplements and shakes are too expensive and don't help.
Ben A.Not enough time, not enough money to eat healthy
Anthony F.Too many conflicting priorities at night which included work that left me too tired to exercise or eat healthy.
Terry G.I told myself I was going through a divorce, running a house, working full time, going to school full-time, raising a 6-month old baby. The one thing that took a back seat was my health.
Greg C.I had just gotten lazy. I didn't think I was a big fat guy, until big fat guys started saying "fat guys like us". I was just working hard and having a good time. I wasn't thinking about what was going on on my body.
Crush your excuses!
Make Time for Yourself
This is always a tough one, even for me today. Self-imposed guilt on doing something for yourself isn’t healthy and really isn’t the outcome we want. Everyone, I mean EVERYONE, needs a little “Me Time” and everyone uses that time differently. It could be a hobby, a sport or possibly just being lazy every once in a while and thats okay too.
How you use your “Me Time” is entirely up to you. However, you should know that using this time to better yourself will not only benefit you personally, but everyone that you have a close relationship with. Also, if you don’t give yourself some attention, at some point you are likely going to break down and be unavailable to everyone! This is a place you definitely don’t want to be in. When you are stretched too thin, you aren’t able to offer/provide focused attention on anything, let along yourself. Don’t try to be the end all for everything and everyone, but do make sure that you still leave time for yourself!
Putting your own health and fitness at a higher priority than it is today has numerous benefits:
- Sleep Better
- More Energy
- Less Sick
- Positive Attitude Towards Yourself and Others
- Influence on Others
- Live Longer
- Save Money
Simply Become Aware of Your Nutrition
This is generally where most people will struggle due to poor choices they have made in their past. However, nutritional changes, even small changes, can have the largest impact on your overall health. The simplest thing that I suggest for people is to just start tracking what you are eating… that means EVERYTHING! Change nothing else and just track what you are eating for 1 week, 7 days. If you do this and you are honest about it, you will probably be shocked at the amount of empty calories you are taking in day after day. Using an app/website like www.myfitnesspal.com is a great tool to help you track your nutrition. I use still use it everyday, despite my own current level of fitness. If you can’t use that, use the old fashion method and write it down.
To lessen the shock of a the transition to a more healthy way of eating.
First, get rid of the word “Diet”. We aren’t taking about a 6 or 8 week diet that you will just simply go back to you old ways at the end. We are talking about your nutrition on a daily basis going forward….FOREVER.
Second, instead of immediately running out to the grocery and buying only fresh fruits and vegetables and organic this and that. Start by removing 1-2 items from your daily intake that you know you can and should do without. Replace those things with a healthy alternative. What are you drinking everyday? It is likely more than just water. Start there and if you can cut back on everything other than water. You will likely be saving more than just the money spent on those sugary, empty calories found in soda, energy drinks, mocha-whatever, etc…
Shakeology is something that I feel has been a supplement that can curb cravings for me. I tend to stick with the chocolate flavor since that is an item on my sweet tooth list and it tastes amazing! Not only that, but I know that by simply drinking one serving of Shakeology per day, my body is getting a crazy amount of nutrition. I currently am not replacing a meal with Shakeology, but if you are in need of losing weight, replacing a meal like breakfast with Shakeology will give your body a great start to the day and you will know that it is likely the best source of nutrition you will have the rest of that day. So, if things come up or you get stuck in a position where you simply cannot choose a healthy alternative, having that serving of Shakeology is something you can fall back on.
Third, clean out your fridge and pantry. If you know you have little to no will-power when it comes to the junk that may be lingering in your home, get rid of it! If it isn’t there, you can’t have it. This isn’t as big of a deal for me as I tend to feel like my self-control is pretty good. But I can’t lie, if there is something within reach and is on my sweet tooth list, it takes even more self-control than normal.
Get Yourself Active
Start by getting off the couch. I know it’s comfortable and super-convenient to just lay there like a log while you surf all of the channels available with your TV, but it isn’t helping you move towards any of your own health and fitness goals. If that means that you want to get started with an entry-level, structured fitness program like Power90 or 10 Minute Trainer, great! Just remember it needs to be something that is sustainable in the long run. It must be something that you will want to continue to do 4-5 times a week. That certainly does not mean that you have to do the same thing for the next 10 years, I wouldn’t advise that. You just want to ensure that if you are not used to regular exercise, you may want to start out strong and give it everything you’ve got. But in the long term, you may not be realistic with yourself to continue such a rigorous schedule/routine. With that in mind, you will want to start with something that is going to challenge you, but not to the point where quitting after the first week is already on your mind.
Once you have reached a level of fitness that you set out to reach, you may find that you are comfortable in that place, but you’ll want to maintain that level for as long as possible. This is where creating a sustainable plan is important. If you started with P90X and got awesome results, but simply don’t want to commit to 6 days per week, then you’ll want to scale that back, either with a different fitness program or picking and choosing the specific routines within that program that you prefer.
However, if you get bitten by the fitness bug, like I have, you will likely want to push yourself even further and will be looking for new and different ways to challenge your level of fitness upward. In some cases you will find an entirely new passion, like mountain biking or surfing or whatever. Something that you didn’t think that you would ever get into and it was all because you decide to get off of the couch!
- Take a Walk with your wife and family
- Go on a Bike Ride
- Do the Yard Work you have been putting off.
- Play Golf (No Cart)
- Use Active.com to find local events.
Get Your Kids Active
You set the example to your kids in so many ways, and health and fitness should be no exception. Getting your kids active and involved with something physical does two things; gets them off the couch as well and keeps you accountable when you include yourself in their activities. Showing them that being active is both fun and beneficial is a great way to spend quality time with each other.
- Take your Kids to the Park
- Explore a new Hiking Trail
- Play their Favorite Sport with them
- Go Camping
My kids love to mimic my workouts in my workout area. Of course, I don’t have them in there with my going full steam with a P90X2 or Body Beast routine, but I encourage them to try out my equipment and they really like showing off.
What’s the Point?
There is more to being healthy and fit than having large biceps or a set of 6 pack abs. Far more! As noted above, there are many physical benefits to living a more healthy and fit lifestyle, but there are also many intangible benefits as well. Benefits that have enormous value but cannot be purchased from any store.
I have, again, recruited the help of some of the Dads that I interact with on a daily basis for their input on this subject. Check out what they have to say on how putting more focus on their own health and fitness has impacted their family lives.
Neil W.
- We don't waste as much money on crap food so I can spend it on good food and setting positive eating example for family and they have come along on a lot of things, baby steps.
- Rekindled marriage, wife and I used to always argue over if I was fat, now she never says I am fat and just keeps saying she needs to exercise and lose 10 lbs.
- More energy to play with the kids, father-son soccer matches, running in the yard, breaking out random pullups on the local monkey bars.
My kids are proud of me, I am the fit dad and not the fat one (I hear more "my dad can do that").- Getting the life back in order from a fitness point of view has me wanting to tidy all other aspects as well like de-cluttering the house.
- My other hobbies took away from family time this one adds time or allows me to spend more time with the family so it is easier for the family to help me make time to exercise.
Anthony F.I switched to morning routines which allowed me to interact more with my son and gave me more energy after work. My 19 month old can now do burpees in command.
Ben A.Too many ways to list, it has become a hobby and so basically I can share my hobby with my family, and since Bridgette is all in, our children get to see us share a common goal.
Greg C.I can run and play with my children. While other dads are on the side line, I am playing on the jungle gym with my kids. I can toss my 4&7 yr old around, play tag, a run beside the bicycles. A lot of times I am the jungle gym. My girls know how important fitness is. They don't remember a fat, lazy dad. When my 7 yr old sees my old pictures, she has this strange look on her face.
Terry G.I am a better father, partner, and person because of the changes made. I just feel "better".
Getting Started
“The start is what stops most people.” Far too often this is true. You can talk yourself out of almost anything, despite knowing how much you can benefit from it. Taking that first step, while it may be small in reality, is a critical one in the process. If you never take it, you can’t expect anything in your life; health and fitness or otherwise, to change.
What other Dads suggest
Neil W.Just commit, toss aside all excuses and DO IT .... pick your WHY focus on it and get it done, it takes more time to make excuses than do the work! This is not a diet or a fad, it is a lifestyle change!
Ben A.Choose a program that has it all laid out for you, commit to finishing the program and the rewards will far outweigh any excuse that you can come up with.
Anthony F.Start off slow and find out what routine works best for you.
Terry G.Pick a program and push play.
Greg C.Just start. Don't get overwhelmed. Consistency over time equals greatness.
Ready?
If you are ready to get started, I would love to help you!
Need a Coach?
If you need to find someone that will hold you accountable, answer your questions, help you, and PUSH YOU for the entire duration of your workout! Luckily for you, that’s what me and my team are here for. If you don’t have a coach yet and want one, I’d love to be your coach and help you through a fitness program. I am available to help you reach your goals!
Email Me: coachchris@yourfitnesspath.com
Connect on Facebook: fb.com/coachcoburn
YouTube: https://youtu.be/coachchriscoburn
Instagram: @chris_coburn
Twitter: @yourfitnesspath
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